Last week, I went to a party on Saturday night. I met a couple of nice people there and we chatted a bit. There was one woman in particular, with whom I've been chatting regularly since. We had some of my infamous night-time in-bed conversations. Yes, reading her a monologue from "Equus" can sound seductive when spoken a certain way. I feel a bit more of my old self.
I don't remember seducing Leah. I don't remember it ever being needed. When she re-entered my life a year and a half later, she had spent so much time stalking me that "seduction" became "saying 'yes'." All I can remember for the past three years was being forced to take care of her. Of dealing with her mental illnesses and her numerous quirks. I had no energy left to seduce her. She kept me empty.
What will happen with this woman? I'm not making plans. I just want to hold hands and kiss. And then I want to go home and sleep in my bed without a new batch of worries and stresses. I want to enjoy romantic time with a woman and NOT take be forced to care of her.
Well, tomorrow I'll know for certain if the timing will work. She really wants to see me, and I really want to see her again.
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